At its meeting in December, the NACAC board of directors passed a position statement that encourages policy and practice changes that would better support brothers and sisters in foster care and adoption. NACAC recognizes the critical importance of maintaining and establishing sibling relationships for children and youth who have had their lives turned upside down in foster care.
Key elements of the statement include:
- Allowing children and youth to identify those they consider siblings
- Ensuring that sibling relationships are strongly considered at every decision point in child welfare
- Keeping siblings together or reuniting them as soon as possible whenever it can be done
- Maintaining connections for those siblings who must be separated.
Far too many siblings are separated when they face abuse and neglect. It's time to do far more to keep them together or rebuild fractured relationships.
Showing posts with label siblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label siblings. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Children and Youth Like Me and My Siblings Need Families and Stability
By Michael Drake, former foster youth, West Virginia
In 1998, when I was 12, the state decided that my sister and brothers and I couldn’t safely stay with our mother. After a short stay at a shelter, we were placed together in a foster family. When they decided to stop doing foster care, we were sent to another shelter.
I asked my workers to find my aunt, uncle, or other relatives, but no one did. I was so frustrated and upset, that I ran away. They wanted to do a psychological evaluation on me due to the fact that I had been running away and showing behavior that they deemed was abnormal. So I was placed in a mental health facility in Ohio. In the three months that I was there, they said that I really didn’t have any mental health issues.
After I left there, my siblings and I were placed with a foster family. About a week later our mother gave up her rights to me and my siblings. We stayed with that foster family for about a year, which was the most permanent placement I ever had in foster care.
Between 14 and 18, I moved more than 15 times, bouncing between shelters, group care facilities, and foster families. I did not live with my brothers and sister and rarely got to spend time with them. I tried to remind them that we were still a family, but it was hard.
I wish the state had done more to help our mom keep the family together. If the state had invested the same money they spent putting us in all those placements into weekly visits with our mother and had given her skill lessons, it might not have escalated to us needing to go into permanent foster care.
At 18, I “aged out” of foster care without any family at all. So did my brother Randy. My sister was adopted and my youngest brother remains in foster care. In my opinion, foster care destroyed our whole sense of family in the end. We can’t sit down together and feel like we are siblings. It becomes more like, “Oh, I know that person” but it’s not like, “Oh, he’s my brother.”
In 1998, when I was 12, the state decided that my sister and brothers and I couldn’t safely stay with our mother. After a short stay at a shelter, we were placed together in a foster family. When they decided to stop doing foster care, we were sent to another shelter.
I asked my workers to find my aunt, uncle, or other relatives, but no one did. I was so frustrated and upset, that I ran away. They wanted to do a psychological evaluation on me due to the fact that I had been running away and showing behavior that they deemed was abnormal. So I was placed in a mental health facility in Ohio. In the three months that I was there, they said that I really didn’t have any mental health issues.
After I left there, my siblings and I were placed with a foster family. About a week later our mother gave up her rights to me and my siblings. We stayed with that foster family for about a year, which was the most permanent placement I ever had in foster care.
Between 14 and 18, I moved more than 15 times, bouncing between shelters, group care facilities, and foster families. I did not live with my brothers and sister and rarely got to spend time with them. I tried to remind them that we were still a family, but it was hard.
I wish the state had done more to help our mom keep the family together. If the state had invested the same money they spent putting us in all those placements into weekly visits with our mother and had given her skill lessons, it might not have escalated to us needing to go into permanent foster care.
At 18, I “aged out” of foster care without any family at all. So did my brother Randy. My sister was adopted and my youngest brother remains in foster care. In my opinion, foster care destroyed our whole sense of family in the end. We can’t sit down together and feel like we are siblings. It becomes more like, “Oh, I know that person” but it’s not like, “Oh, he’s my brother.”
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